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Instead, have this. Written in half an hour!


The Long Way Around

If there is anybody, in the history of ever, who knows that Matsumoto Jun is not supposed to be in love with Ohno Satoshi, it's Jun. The fact that the list of reasons of why he shouldn't starts with 'we have nothing in common' is like a sharp slap in the face for the sensible mind.

Yeah, he really shouldn't but he loves him anyway.

At least he can hide it.

"Mattsun's not a very good actor," Aiba tells him one night.

Jun would be hurt about this vote of non-confidence from Aiba except for the fact that he and Aiba are both drunk off their asses on his stupidly expensive--but worth every penny--couch. So he giggles. "You're one to talk."

Aiba giggles back at him, rolls over, and falls on the floor. "Noooo," he says from his new spot on the carpet. "I mean. I mean with Leader. How you look at him. Or don't. Because you totally don't."

"Shut up." How bad is it if Aiba's noticed? "I do too."

"You look and then you look away and you look down like...like..." Aiba sits up so suddenly that he nearly knocks heads with Jun, who's leaned over the couch to look at him. "It's like..." and Aiba looks down, ducks his chin and casts his eyes to the side. He doesn't bite his lip, not quite, but somehow the impression is there. So is the suggestion of a blush.

Aiba, Jun decides drunkenly, is a good mimic. "Shut up. I don't act like that. That's girl behavior."

Grinning, Aiba leans over and plants a sloppy, affectionate kiss on his cheek. "It's cute. Everybody thinks so. Leader thinks so. You should talk to him sometime," he says.

Jun would rather die of embarrassment or kill the others out of pure mortification. "They have not noticed," he declares. Aiba opens his mouth and then shuts it again. Meekly.

Damn straight, Jun thinks.

If he thought that was the end of it, he really thought wrong.

"Jun-kun," Sho catches him up inside Tokyo Dome.

"Sho," Jun smiles at him.

Oddly enough, Sho looks he would rather be anywhere but beside him. He takes a short breath. "You know, Satoshi really admires you. Things like today? Your planning and suggestions? He really--he likes that a lot about you."

Jun blinks. He's been doing this for years and he's just noticing now? How is it that it's just adorable when it's Leader finally seeing it? Jun smiles and coughs to hide it. "Ah. That's good. Thanks for telling me." It's weird, but good. Jun can take this moment and store it away in his heart for a rainy day.

Sho's eyes close briefly. Split-second brief. His smile seems a little forced. "You should talk to him."

"About the concert?" Jun frowns. Leader is never interested.

Sho's smile is definitely a little forced now. "About stuff."

He gets it. But it's Sho, so he smiles. "Right. Thanks."

"Good." Sho looks relieved and leaves so fast Jun's surprised posters aren't being torn off the wall in his wake.

Jun shakes his head and goes on his way. They're busy, he's busy and the last thing he needs to do is screw them all up by dorking out around Ohno. Somehow, Ohno makes him feel seventeen again.

He'll just ignore it.

And he would, except Nino climbs into the company car that's taking him home.

"Get out. Your car is over there." Jun points out. It's possible Nino's missed this because Nino has his DS in hand. And then, because it's Nino, "Because none of us is allowed to drive."

Nino bares his teeth at him. "Hey, NEWS isn't allowed either."

"You still have to get out of my car," Jun tells him.

"In a second." And Nino actually stores his DS in his bag and looks at Jun dead on. "Okay, Sho told me to talk to you so you shut up and listen because I'm only going to say this one time. Oh-chan and I are soulmates. We're always going to be soulmates. We're always going to hold hands and grope and kiss each other at random times and have entire conversations in our brains. We're always going to be together like this. As long as you don't try to get in between that, you and me are fine."

For a second, Jun's heart stops. When it starts, it starts up with an angry rumble that turns into a roar of thunder. Jun is a lot of things, but a boyfriend-stealer is not one of them. Especially not when it's Nino because--and he can't believe it himself some days--he loves Nino. There's nothing he'd do to hurt Nino, even if it means cutting out his own heart and stomping on it to spare Nino the pain. "I'm not an asshole, Kazunari," Jun tells him icily.

He's surprised by the way Nino half-smiles at him, nodding firmly. "You can talk to Oh-chan," he says as he gets out of the car.

Jun sits back in his seat. Like he needs Ohno to confirm this. Hell, half the Johnny's and probably most of Japan already suspected Ohmiya SK of being a cover for the real-deal.

It still hurts, though.

Pi tosses a copy of the latest Wink-Up on the table in front of him. "Hina said you'd want to see that," he says.

It's open to Toma's message. There's one for Jun. It says: Talked to Shige and he says that our fisherman talks about taking you fishing. When are you going to go? You should talk to him!

Jun narrows his eyes. "Pi? Are you going to see Toma anytime soon?" he asks.

Pi sighs. "Is this going to end with me throwing Wink-Up in his face? Because you should talk to somebody about your issues."

Jun throws the magazine at Pi's retreating back.

A week later, just as Jun is putting it all behind him, he walks in on Sho and Nino huddled up and talking. "...thought you were going to talk to him," Sho says.

"I did," Nino sulks. "You know how long publishing takes; maybe it happened ages ago."

"It's just. He hasn't. And he's getting really hopeless about it."

"Tell me about it," Nino mutters.

Jun walks into the room. "I got the message, okay?" he says.

He can't help it that his heart still looks to Leader. If it takes him some time to get over it, they can't blame him.

Still, for Arashi, he resolves to get it under control. "You don't have to worry anymore," he tells them, looking in his bag for his ipod so he can set up a 'get over this' playlist.

Two days later, Shun lets himself in to Jun's apartment. "You should really talk to your Leader about the way you feel," he says.

Jun, who is in the middle of getting dressed to go out and meet an old friend for drinks, flips Shun the finger. "Sure thing," he says.

Shun burrows his way into Jun's arms. "Dude? Nino talked to me. Ninomiya got up in my face and said 'talk sense into his ass' and I am here to tell you: talk to Leader. Get this out before Leader starts finding this annoying rather than cute, okay?"

Jun has stopped listening after the whole 'Nino talked to me' thing. "I'm going to kill him," he says.

"Cool. He's at my place."

"Fuck you, Nino," Jun says, slamming into Shun's apartment.

Inoue Mao looks at him blandly. "Is this going to be one of those boy moments?" she asks.

Jun looks at her. "What are you doing here?"

Nino rolls his eyes. "We're having dinner," he says, waving to the take-out cartons. To Shun he says, "I thought you were going to hole up at Jun's so we could be alone?"

"I will," Shun assures him. "I just wanted to see what Jun was going to do. He's so cute, I can't stand it! I'll take him if Leader won't."

Jun looks around, suddenly more confused than he really wants to let on. "Fuck you," he says weakly.

Mao stands up and comes to his side. She pokes him, hard. "You like Leader. Nino and I have been dating since we got married in that drama, Shun's letting us use his place so we're not seen, and Ohno Satoshi has been trying to get you to confess to him for months."

"...what? But Nino..." He turns to Nino. "How could you cheat on him after you told me he was your soulmate?"

Mao jerks around to look at Nino. "You told him that?"

"I told you that," Nino says, obviously reminding her.

Mao looks at him again. "He didn't mean that they're gay, he meant that they're stupid for each other. As long as you can accept Nino kissing your boyfriend, you'll be okay."

Jun stares at her. And then at Nino.

Mao makes a motion at Shun. "So go talk to him, you dummy!" Mao tells Jun as Shun picks her up at the waist and lifts her enough so that she can smack Jun in the back of the head. "He's waiting," she tells him softly, giving his hair a comforting stroke. "He's waiting for you."

"...what?" Jun repeats stupidly. This is. This is more than he can take in.

"GO!" Mao and Shun and Nino all say it.

So he goes. Along the way he gets texts from Toma, Sho, and Aiba. They all say 'GO'.

Ohno's apartment is new to Jun. Nino's been, but he's never dared. There's always been a barrier that starts with 'we have nothing in common' and sort of ends with 'and I like him too much'.

"Uh," he says when Ohno opens the door.

Smiling, Ohno holds the door open and steps back. "I was hoping you'd come around."

I'm given to understand that in Japan, when you like somebody, you go through third parties to get the idea across. Hence the indirect way Ohno--and everybody else--goes about things.



( 45 comments — Leave a comment )
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Aug. 3rd, 2010 08:03 pm (UTC)
He's so cute, I can't stand it! I'll take him if Leader won't


This was absolutely charming in every way; funny, cute, full of friendship and siliness and Jun overthinking things. Goodness, I just loved every word of it.

Aug. 3rd, 2010 10:03 pm (UTC)
i just have to say that your icon is the BEST XD LOL
(no subject) - still_ciircee - Aug. 8th, 2010 07:13 am (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 3rd, 2010 08:04 pm (UTC)

Are you still walmart's bitch? :<

Also: JunToshi, totally not my thing but you could write anything and I'd be all over it. :3 Also, NinoMao...not something I'm used to seeing, tbh, because Nino really is a gay little fucker but....CUTE. :Db

Aug. 8th, 2010 07:16 am (UTC)
Juntoshi is not my thing either. But every so often I see really bad Juntoshi or some totally awful Ohmiya and I think 'fuck this noise' and something like this happens.

Nino really is a gay little fucker

He's totally bi! He as good as said so on interview! Truthfully? I like giving Nino random girlfriends and I really wanted to have Mao in this. Two great tastes and all that...

(Plus, how creeped out would Jun be by Nino/Mao?)
Aug. 3rd, 2010 08:05 pm (UTC)
It is so cute and so indirect and so long awaited that it breaks my heart!

It is beautiful. ♥

Thank you very much.
(I hope you're fine!)
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:17 am (UTC)
I am fine! Just mostly busy! Thank you for caring, though! ♥ And I'm really glad you liked this. Juntoshi is not my pairing of choice but they could be so damn CUTE together, so sweet, that sometimes I can't resist them.
Aug. 3rd, 2010 08:07 pm (UTC)
That was adorable. Everybody has to let him know that Ohno's waiting for him...clueless Jun's cute.
Nino, the master of words as always.
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:21 am (UTC)
XD I abuse Jun so much. But, to be fair, he's not exactly clueless. He just figured that his friends thought he was the girl who needed to go confess and get all the weirdness out of the way--rather than what was really going on, that his friends were thinking he was the GUY getting the message from the girls' friends to GO ASK HER OUT ALREADY, OMG.

Aug. 3rd, 2010 08:54 pm (UTC)
"I just wanted to see what Jun was going to do. He's so cute, I can't stand it! I'll take him if Leader won't."


P.S. Omg, Ohno/Jun fic! That includes the rest of Arashi! All encouraging him! And going through third parties! I love you with a fiery, fiery passion. Especially for the way you make Jun's life hell, but in the way he totally deserves. I love that they ALL make his life difficult, in their own special ways. ♥
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:24 am (UTC)
SHUN/JUN NINJAS IT'S WAY INTO MY BRAIN AND DEMANDS TO BE SHARED. S-seriously? Did you see his face when Shun was on their show? Or SHUN'S? It's like they're Ohmiya, only with less ass-grabbing and more crap-giving.

♥ I'm glad you liked the Ohno/Jun, though. Sometimes I just feel the need to step in and say 'no, no, they work together without angst, betrayal, and heartbreak'. And who doesn't love to abuse Jun's dignity?
(no subject) - beckerbell - Aug. 8th, 2010 11:46 pm (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 3rd, 2010 10:02 pm (UTC)
somehow this was a fun story :D it's cute how everyone just tries to get them together~
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:25 am (UTC)
I'm happy you liked it! It was fun writing it and thinking of how they'd all go about it.
Aug. 3rd, 2010 10:22 pm (UTC)
this is the most wonderful thing. when everything else in the world makes me sad, you still make me happy. ♥
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:25 am (UTC)
♥ I'm sorry the world is making you sad. If you give me a prompt I might eventually, some day in the unknown future, write you a fic. Becasue you make me happy.
Aug. 3rd, 2010 10:32 pm (UTC)
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD *pats poor, oblivious Jun*

Mao makes a motion at Shun. "So go talk to him, you dummy!" Mao tells Jun as Shun picks her up at the waist and lifts her enough so that she can smack Jun in the back of the head. TOO CUTE FOR WORDS OMG. I don't particularly miss the drama-ness of Hanadan, but I certainly miss those people being around each other. Good thing Jun and Shun are too BFFs as to not share their dorkyness with us more or less frequently.
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:28 am (UTC)
I love Jun so much. :D

I loved HYD but it ended well and it was enough. But seeing Shun and Jun together? Hearing their retarded stories about each other? More please! And I loved watching them with Mao. Or watching Shun with Abe and Matsuda. That cast had such good chemistry with each other.
Aug. 3rd, 2010 11:46 pm (UTC)

ff man, juntoshi is never written well and so i always kind of hide away from it, but it's you and so it's just fabulous. ILU.

half an hour, you brag.
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:31 am (UTC)
Totally not homo!

I usually dislike JunToshi, too. It's not really my pairing and so much of it demonize Nino. But then Ohmiya fic will single out Jun as the bad guy and I stand up and say 'oh YEAH?' and this happens.

(Well, I wrote it in half an hour. The idea has been kicking around for months. Ever since the last Jun-rapes-Ohno fic. Or was it Nino he raped? I don't know. BUT SINCE THAT TIME. So it didn't come out of nowhere in half an hour. That was just the wording. The scenes were in my head already.)
(no subject) - honeypuffed - Aug. 8th, 2010 01:19 pm (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 4th, 2010 03:53 am (UTC)
So cute, LOL! I'm not a big juntoshi fan, but I kind of adore the cheesey romance drama that goes on. And Nino. OH NINO. I love him so much!

I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to go to work though @_@
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:33 am (UTC)
Oh, god. WORK. Why must it be so...work-like? Why can't our jobs be full of rainbow gay and sparkles? ;____;

Other than that, yeah, I'm not one for Juntoshi either but if anybody is going to have a cheesy romance with Ohno, it's going to be Jun. Because they are such puppies together. And I'm glad you liked Nino in this. I loved writing his scene in the car and how he didn't realize what the hell he said WRONG there. I love that kid.
(no subject) - tangiblewhimsy - Aug. 8th, 2010 07:36 am (UTC) - Expand
ICON! &hearts; - still_ciircee - Aug. 8th, 2010 07:45 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: ICON! &hearts; - tangiblewhimsy - Aug. 8th, 2010 07:46 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: ICON! &hearts; - still_ciircee - Aug. 8th, 2010 10:42 pm (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 4th, 2010 05:35 am (UTC)
I love this, but my absolute favorite moment is Sho lifting Mao up so she can smack Jun. ♥
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:34 am (UTC)
I loved the chemistry between Shun and Mao and Jun. It was me shamelessly playing on that love that lead to that moment. Plus I think Mao is one of the only people who can whack Jun and get away with it. I'm glad you liked the fic, though. ♥ You're such a great writer that it makes me feel wonderful when you like my stuff.
Aug. 4th, 2010 06:13 pm (UTC)
Oh lord, I love your brain&hearts Sho lifting Mao, all the indirect prods, Nino staking his claim while giving the green light.

and now I have to go to work. But I'm going with a smile, dammit.
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:36 am (UTC)
Boo, work! But yay, I'm glad I could make you smile before you had to go! I'm super happy that you liked this--especially the Shun-lifting-Mao and the prods and Nino's 'omg, you can't date my boyfriend unless you agree that I'm always his first boyfriend! moment. That moment was actually the scene that inspired this entire fic.

You make me happy. ♥
Aug. 5th, 2010 06:00 pm (UTC)
it's rare to find juntoshi fics and even rarer to find GOOD juntoshi fics so this was so awesome to read.

i love the roundabout way and how everyone was involved. this was fantastic.

Aug. 8th, 2010 07:38 am (UTC)
I'm not much for Juntoshi so I'm glad to see a fan who likes this fic! I really think they're a sweet pair and that they could be so cute and so GOOD together but I see SO many Ohmiya fics that trash Jun and out of the few Ohno/Jun fics I've read so many of them tend to bash Nino. I really wanted to show the side of Juntoshi that hapens WITHOUT those things. So I'm glad that worked for you. I am SO glad. Thank you!
Aug. 7th, 2010 04:35 am (UTC)
Oh, Jun, poor Jun! Everybody knowing his business before he even knows it himself XD
This was great, though. Even though Ohmiya will always be my no.1 (then Yama pair...then Juntoshi), it was adorable. Or maybe I just like Jun being frustrated...

Either way, I really enjoyed it!
Aug. 8th, 2010 07:40 am (UTC)
lol! Ohmiya is my number one and Juntoshi really comes in last for me. Sometimes I just love to play with the dynamic. This was partially a Jun-and-Nino fic for me, since the scene in the car is what got this whole thing started in my head. I'm so glad you liked it, though! And 'everybody knowin ghis business before he even knows it himself' is an excellent way of putting it! Poor Jun! At least he got Leader at the end of it. ♥ Thank you so much for reading this and for commenting!
Aug. 8th, 2010 08:09 am (UTC)
have I ever told you that it's my secretest of hearts that Nino and Mao get together?

This was BRILLIANTLY stupid. And I love-love-love that Ohmiya are still soul mates and that it takes a GIRL to cut to the chase. YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU!
Aug. 8th, 2010 10:44 pm (UTC)
XD I love giving Nino random women as his girlfriends. My favorite is Misono but...Nino and Mao? Can you imagine Jun's trauma face? ♥ Plus, Mao is adorable and so is Nino. They'd bully each other and be cute

I'm really glad you liked the story and the Ohmiya in it (they are one, yo). And Mao is sensible. Besides, nothing else was working, sometimes you just have to tell a boy he's being stupid.
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( 45 comments — Leave a comment )